The Journey to Wholeness

The Journey to Wholeness

Many times I have come across the story of Naaman in 2nd Kings 5. Naaman was a powerful and honorable Commander in the army of the King of Syria. Although he was of high standards, he had a major issue in his life that held him back in many ways, he was inflicted with Leprosy. Through a servant girl, Naaman approached Elisha for healing. Elisha gave him the answers, the process for healing, but Naaman didn't like his answer. Naaman wanted to go with what was familiar, what was easier, and what he believed to be true. Well that didn't work out for him so he talked to his servants and decided to do what Elisha the prophet, told him to do in the first place. So Naaman went to the Jordan and dipped seven times, not once or twice, although I wouldn't doubt he expected each time he came up out of the water he would be healed. One...two...three...four........seven times he had to follow the instructions completely and not give up at three or four, or even six and a half. The seventh time, COMPLETE RESTORATION, HEALING, NEW SKIN. Can you imagine the excitement, joy and tears he shed, because he was made brand new?

I am reminded of this story when I want to quit my journey to wholeness. When I choose the familiar way of doing life, well because it was familiar. Although it may be painful it's what I have known. Good reason? No but true. In the midst of the process, clear and insightful thinking are not always present.
It's been a long journey, mostly because I have chosen to believe the lies of self hatred, shame and mistrust, in my life. I have done things my way, like Naaman, I wanted to go the easier route because the pain of it all was too much. ALL of the journey requires vulnerability and although I have been vulnerable, there hangs in the shadows, a fear if I am totally vulnerable, totally honest about my thoughts and feelings, I would be rejected or abandoned.

Like Naaman, God has put key people in my life that have spoken truth to me. I would dip a few rounds and want to give up. Just being honest. But God continued to love me unconditionally through others and situations. Not once has He given up on me, nor have those He has placed around me. So the "dipping" continues because I never know if that next emersion will be the time I come up healed and free! 

MIssions to Asia

WE MADE IT!! just a small glitch but all was taken care of!!!!

 I can't say how much I have been blessed by all of you. I have felt so much love poured out and I know I keep saying THANK YOU but I seriously don't think I can say it enough.

It's crazy that I have already been persecuted about going on this trip. Telling me that it is no place for a woman. Grant it I don't think I am the type they are looking for but if everyone believed the line "let someone else do it" then nothing would ever be accomplished. There are so many who live without hope, live without ever feeling loved, or just needs that bit of encouragement to push a little harder. I am not one to ever sit back and let someone else "do it". I told my daughter today that I want to leave a LEAGACY  for my kids and my grandkids, that even one person CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE. To follow the HEART OF GOD!

My final stretch is here, March 01, 2013, in the amount of $1792. They divide our payments up for #1 Deposit, #2 Plane ticket, and #3 is the final cost. I was able to also contribute to this trip so we can do this together.
Our plane leaves on April 1st for 3 Countries in Asia where we will be going over to love on those who have been through Human Trafficking/Slavery, orphanages and taking filters for water purification to areas that do not have help. For those who have contributed to this trip I would love it if you would private msg me your address's.

Bless you ALL!
Tricia Dowless
missiontrips.ibethel.org

Freedom 2013

I cannot not wait till I get to share with you about the is trip. I have definitely come alive. Three years ago I got whacked by the HS the moment I walked into the Civic Center at Randi Clark (RC). The next thing I knew I was on a plane to work in Haiti after the EQ.
Last week I really tried to feel something at RC but nothing was happening for me. Then I come to the LA trip and I get so snockered by the HS, I laughed and laughed for hours. Really hours. I couldnt use the bathroom with out help, I couldnt get to my car or even put my coat on without help. As I was riding back to Oasis I was just in a stupor and then we entered the bldg it all began again, the uncontrollable, embarassing laugher, me, really? Yep and quiet  some precarious positions too. It was probably the first time I was totally free and didnt care about anything but what God was doing. I was getting FREE!!! in so many way. I felt it the next day along with the pain of manifesting for hours. I feel different, i feel much more freedom and joy. So much I had a wrestling match with Sara Webster and Brandon Schraden at the gravesites of Aimee Semple McPherson and Kathyrn Kuhlman.
Well thats another story but I can say I am not returning back, once again, as the same person i came down as.

Two Alcholics and Jesus

On Venice Beach talking with individuals, hippies, homeless, and skaters. People from all walks of life. It always makes my heart happy to sit down and listen to peoples stories. This particular woman, Ethelia,  was watching our group and she called me over after hearing of another man come over and give his life to the Lord but mostly he was ready to give up alcohol. This man touched some of the most sensitive areas of our hearts. He just walks up to us after telling him how much God loved him. He announces he is done with alcohol and wants to get help. His brother was called in Orange County and agrees to come to get him to take him to rehabilitation center.

Ethelia, she said she was also an alcoholic. I can agree to that statement and I prayed with her and she accepted Christ as her Lord. She began to cry and then asked if I would brush her hair because she wanted to look pretty. This woman was wearing a very old and thin wig but to her it was important that she looked pretty so we brushed and brushed and with each stroke I made declarations over her. She then hopped up and went across the street. I was taken back by the what happened next. She bought us 3 very large pizzas. An act of kindness for being so sweet to her. I encouraged her to get the help she needed but her being honest with me, she wants to stop but according to her its too painful to. 

I shared with her about overcoming pain and about the payoff I was getting by holding onto it. I knew she was listening. 

I cant help wonder how many people are where they are because no one believed in them. How many just need to be shown unconditional love? Me? I could have sat with her for as long as she wanted me to. I was happy she invited Jesus into her heart, she wanted to stop drinking also. I left her with information in the area she could get some help.  Tonight I wonder where she is, lying on the beach or curled up in the corner of an building. Either way, tonight she has God in her heart. 

Plump and Juicy LOVE!

The highlight of Venice Beach for me was meeting a woman from Nashville TN. I shared with her why I came from NC to the West Coast. It opened a door for me and I stepped right in. :)
She loves the Lord and wanted to know more about Bethel. I told her what God has been sharing about my heart and how He wants me to love myself as much as He loves me. 
I am my hardest critic. 
God showed me that my heart looked just like a sundried tomato, shriveled us, no love running through it.,  and said I am going to make it plump and juicy. I even drew a picture of my heart in stages of beginning to end. 
In her craftsmanship she had made me a necklace that is beautiful. Its a big red heart wrapped in silver wired. I knew this was my plump juicy heart. So every time I wear it I will be reminded of how much he is wanting me to be open to loving myself unconditionally. I got to bless her and she bless me.
#lovethelittlethings

Daughter of the King

I don't know how to say how many ways God has met my needs in a time I couldn't see how it could happen. This last month has been a difficult financially and yet I have been given food b/c someone was moving, a friend gave me clothes she could no longer wear, some still with the tags on them and they were exactly what I needed. Money coming in a little at a time as bills due and then last week I got shifts scheduled all the way through June with a new contract, meaning less likely I will be cancelled. I made if through a rough spot because I refuse to live with a poverty mindset and as an orphan. I am a daughter of the King who meets all my needs.

Transitioning from Bethel School of Ministry

This week I graduate from "3rd Year" of BSSM. This journey has been amazing to say the least. It has changed my life and I am so blessed God allowed me to see it through all three years. I have learned a lot about what God has done for me, how He sees me and mostly about my relationship with Him.

I am transitioning into a new place in my life. God showed me yesterday, the fruition of my dreams He has put in my heart over the years, the ones I thought would never come about or I couldn't figure out how in the world that could happen. Well its here now. I am so stoked on this new season. I have learned to live moment to moment. I feel like Moses did when God chose him to do mighty things and he couldn't see how he could do those things. But my God says He will use the foolish things to confound the wise.

Yeah, I can't wait to see this unfold. I want to leave a legacy for my children and my children's children and so on. But at the moment I will take one step at a time and do what I promised Him I would do, steward what He puts in front of me, well.

Thank you Daddy for believing in me!

Reflecting

Taking a moment to be thankful I was able to go on this trip to Los Angeles. Thankful for the ability to put everything else aside and focus on what God is doing. I could definitely live my life doing this everyday. I love to see lives affected by the love and the presence of God and little me, a woman who was just living life minute to minute with the dreams I carried in my heart of ministry, have come to fruititon these last few years. Although there has been sacrifice's to see this happen, I know I am where I'm supposed to be, doing what God has me doing.
I'm by no means even close to being this perfect person, matter of fact I am far from it, but in His eyes He sees my heart for those in need across the board.
I am so blessed to be around people who love on me, who have walked beside me in difficult times, and no matter how insecure I may be, He uses me in the most suprising moments.

Handle Bars

Worship begins, so much has been weighing on me this week, I am easily distracted. As I enter into His presence, the Lord takes me on a trip. I am on this old fashioned bike. 

I am heading down a long hill, gripping the handle bars and as I pick up speed the thought comes to me to let go of the handle bars. Just let go. 

Gasp!.. I let go... Oh wow, a little nervous but this feels good. A little steadier...as I put my hands straight out.. I'm flying,.. at least it feels that way. The breeze is blowing across my face as I lean my head back. I've let go...this feels so good...the anxiety disappears and the laughter comes in. Fearless..I can't believe I'm doing this! I love it...yes this feels like freedom. For those few moments, I had completely let go of everything weighing me down. 

As I opened my eyes I am standing in the middle of these seats, with arms stretched wide open. Others immersed in the presence of God. I needed a reminder of how it felt to just let go and trust God with the outcome. 

Even in the Whisper..

When we take the path opened before us, we don't always know where it leads but we do know if we don't go down that path we may never know what is there for us. 


This photo I took at Burney Falls has always reminded me of how God gives light to each step and although I can't see where it ends, I trust He is there for me, at every turn, with every bump, with every detour, He is there for me. He always brings me back where I am supposed to be. 


Never give up on your destiny, never give up on your ability to hear His voice even in the whisper...

Los Angeles 2/2012

This past week I returned to Los Angeles for a time of ministry. I am usually with teams from Bethel but this time it was just me. I learned more about me on this trip, and more about others.
When I arrived plans didn't work out as they were so eloquently listed in my new journey notebook, (note to self, always confirm your plans once again prior to leaving), but although they didn't God came through and took care of me.

First lesson? Don't panic until you know for certain God is not coming through for you. If that happens you have my blessings to panic away.  God orchestrated such a blessing by taking care of every need I had during my entire visit.

Seeing old friends and making new ones.  I met some amazing women of God who showed me relationship. I felt so honored and blessed; not once did I ever feel I was intruding on their space. You see I landed on their couch for 5 nights. When I woke up there was peace in their home and it carried the presence of God 24/7. Whether playing cards or worshiping to the guitar playing by Ritz, it was complete peace.

I had the opportunity to pray for the sick, physically and mentally at "The House of Healing" in Pasadena. The next morning I was invited to attend a meeting for Social Justice/Sex trafficking which was informative and I gained insight of the different levels of social justice.  Poverty links many to sex trafficking because they think of it as a quick fix when in essence it ruins lives. Pornography plays a huge roll in the need for sex and how that trickles down to sex trafficking young girls and boys.  Additionally how can you restore the lives of these individuals after such a horrific time of drug induced, forced sex and threats of harm?

Saturday evening I ministered at "The Well". It's where thirty of us prophesied and gave words of knowledge to appoximately 150 people lined up the street, hungry for what God wanted to say to them. After 5 hours of ministering I was seriously ready for bed.

Sunday morning I headed over to Praise Chapel in the Hollywood area to minister but the Lord had other plans. I could have gotten offended or disappointed but I didn't, I allowed the Holy Spirit to do what He wanted to do and how wonderful it was. I was able to do some more prophesying and praying over some in the church but my heart was touched by two young girls living in a drug infested hotel, give their hearts to the Lord and said "I want more Lord".

I will share some testimonies received after this time in Los Angeles, CA. I want to thank those who covered me in prayer, provided and loved on me while I was there. My plans are to return to Los Angeles soon. I am excited to see all that God is doing.

Blessings!! Tricia

Testimony of God's Goodness

Testimony of God's goodness:


For those of you who have been praying for my son MIcheal for his vision. Last report was, he was losing his vision and going blind. There was nothing else that could be done for his sight. This morning I received a call telling me his specialist is referring him to a cornea expert because the scar tissue has STOPPED GROWING and they believe the scar tissue blocking his vision can be REMOVED!!! and HE WILL SEE AGAIN! This is one happy momma!! I know this is an answer to the prayers that have been lifted up on his behalf. Thank you for your prayers. He goes Friday the 20th, please continue to pray for complete restoration to his eye sight.

If you need healing of any kind take this testimony as a confirmation of the fact that God heals!!!!!!

The Year 2012

2012 is not only the year of "Hope" but its the year I choose to walk in what God has shown me, that I am. In 2009-10 God showed me how He saw me and how much He loved me, and in 2010-11 was the year of God showing me what I am capable of doing if I would trust Him with the walk. I declare that 2012 will be the year, that all He has predestined me to be, the purpose He has for me will be put into effect. (Eph 1)

"Hope" a really good (re-post) from a friend

Today a friend shared this with me and I think it says a lot so I am passing it onto you. Enjoy it!

• • Happy New Year.
    
    Some of you may have noticed I've been talking about hope a lot for the last number of months. It's been interesting intentionally raising my hope level whilst also trying to process through deferred hope and disappointment. Or things not working out quite as you had supposed.
    I am really ready for 2011 to be over and I am very hopeful as to what 2012 holds....even though there is a lot still shrouded in mystery. My last quarter in 2011 was a poor one if I am honest with you. Probably one of the toughest ones I've had in a while, partly because it changed from one extreme to the other almost over night. I have to remind myself that breakthrough and growth can look and feel different from season to season.
    I wanted to share something with you as we step into a new year that has been really powerful to me.
    Almost 2 months ago I had an encounter with God that was really powerful. I was in worship when I heard Him say to me "there's things that you are holding on to in your heart that are taking up room for my hope to occupy. Let go and let hope. Let hope invade. Let hope expand. Let hope do its work." I was floored. I knew exactly what He was referring to. In that moment, I knew He was releasing a supernatural ability to let go of those things, the pain, the disappointment etc and in faith, to step forward into higher levels of His hope. Letting go meant being ok with not having answers right now and possibly ever for why certain things, situations, relationships did or didn't happen. This has been a process for me, not merely limited to just one moment in worship, nor one breakthrough encounter. Its been an intentional day by day saying "im ok with not knowing. Im ok with no answers. I trust in your goodness. And that gives me hope".
    In coming to this place and this practice, I've found my expectation for what's next in 2012 increase and expand. I've even noticed recently a renewed hope in the areas where there were formerly unique disappointments. It makes no sense.
    
    A lot of the prophets are already saying it, but I think it's really key and worth repetition: It's time to get your hopes up as high as they will go as we come into a new year. I feel strongly that some of the things that we still cant see clearly about 2012 are because it's yet to be determined. And we have an invitation to be a part of determining what unfolds. That being said, I feel like our hope levels will be really influential in determining what plays out.
    Often, it can be hard to raise our hopes when we've encountered disappointment in specific areas. And whilst that is true, I know and I've experienced this grace He is releasing to let go of the disappointment in order to come up to a higher place of hope.
    I feel strongly that the areas where you've been disappointed whether it's delayed dreams, promises, community not quite panning out, relational tension, uncertainty & disappointment, position, job, geography being a cause of hopelessness that these will be the areas that you see the greatest increase in terms of your hope level. And its because of this grace He is releasing.
    We may not step into new things over night as we move into 2012 because there is value to process, but in saying that, Hope will be really strategic in navigating and positioning us into proper alignment so that we can be in the right places at the right times with the right people and see the hope we've been cultivating make way for the things our hearts long for to be made manifest. Hope is likened to an anchor in scripture for a reason. In transition, in the waves, in the shaking, it keeps us grounded. Hope means we do not have to be at the mercy of the wind or the waves around us.
    
    
    This year I am making it my goal, my mission to live my life with the most hope ever. And to leak this hope where ever I go.
    I say all of this for the reason to encourage you to let go and let hope. There is a grace to leave discouragement, hopelessness and disappointment behind if you will only receive this Hope invitation from Him.
    His justice in your life looks like Him restoring your capacity to hope in the areas where you may have scars of disappointment.
    "we have this hope as an anchor..."
    
• 
  

Christmas and Family

I love Christmas time, not only is it a time to reflect on the birth of Christ but a time to come together with family. This year I had the chance to spend time with my son-n-law's family. It was good to connect with them and interesting to say the least. When I watched the connection between one another I couldnt help to think of the differences between families.

I love how God talks to me in many different ways, showing me things about my expectations of family. I can't sit here and say that I don't get frustrated or disappointed but I was reminded to enjoy the moment and the simple things Christmas brings.

I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and this New Year will bring joy to your lives. Blessings!