Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Los Angeles, CA Ministry Trip (Day One)

Let me begin saying this trip was a ground breaking trip for me.

I am not sure where to begin but I will just jump in and see where it takes us. If you read my last blog you see this could be a dangerous thing.




Venice Beach:

Our first full day in LA we went to Venice Beach. Venice Beach is always an experience! Full of interesting characters like the young man who hitchiked from Washington state and plays music on plastic containers hoping for that break of stardom, or the lady who sells braclets for a friend because she is homeless and it gives her something to do, and lets not forget the man who after gaining your attention for thirty minutes, walks on glass in thirty seconds.  A lot of music, acts, and of course "medical" marijuana for every need you could ever imagine. There is a lot of drug use, homelessness, and prostitution that seems to go on forever. One of my dreams would be to take a worship group down and just let loose for hours and prophetic paintings that bring people into the presence of God. Could you imagine having a long term place there where all you had to do was bring in the presence of God? Worship, dance, sing, paint, and much more. I can definitely see that as a "after BSSM" ministry calling for some of our students.

The beach, the skate park, and the walkway, haring God's love, giving our version of "Spiritual readings" and drawing prophetic art. Mostly we talked with individuals and shared what God would put on our hearts for them, you could tell some were just hungry for conversation.


 Bonnie Brae House:

We were then able to go to the Bonnie Brae house where the Azusa Street revival began. The tour took all but 5 minutes because the house but so small but you could feel the presence of God there. Some collected in the back bedroom and began singing hymns and familiar songs. I chose to lie in the main area's floor and soak up the sweet presence there. At one moment I could just take myself into the midst of the revival and hear the singing and praising of miracles. This prompted me to open my eyes and see what they saw from the floor and all I saw was this small round vent.  For a second there I thought it was a good idea but it didnt do much for me, the vent that is. I later proceeded to the back bedroom and I laid my head up against the wall, asking myself, as though the walls were talking to me, what stories did they have to tell of the revival, the miracles, the powerful presence of God. Although my mind wondered all they could say I didn't actually hear anything. It was good while it lasted. I then found myself doing a very spiritual thing, I began sliding on the floors in my sock feet down the hallway with a few other guys. Yes! it was childlike and fun, and I throughly enjoyed it.



To be continued......


Monday, November 14, 2011

Yes you can pray for me and if you have some Ritalin, thats a possiblity too! lol

I was headed to bed around 11, then I saw something I needed to do, then it reminded me of appointment I have this morning and for some odd reason, that made me think of my strengths, so I got out my Strength Finders book and wrote down my strengths and that made me think that I haven't documented the prophetic words I have received this year so I thought my quickest way would be to take a picture of them and make it into a slide show. After that I wanted to put a copy in my journal and so I did, when I went into my journal I saw all the cartoons and colorings the kids did for me when I went to Haiti, so I took a pic of them also and began working on getting them in a frame so I would have them. When getting the frame I came across a paper that had my declarations and got on the computer to type them and ended back up on FB.

Its now 3:12am and I have to be up by 8am, Do you see a pattern here? yes I will take around the clock prayer for this, or you can slip me some Ritilan lol

Sunday, November 13, 2011

I matter and I make a difference

I have a card on my wall that reminds me of this daily. I didnt use to think I mattered nor could I make a difference but I know that was a lie. So now I purposefully walk in this daily. Life does happen and can get you distracted easily. The next thing you know, you are having to get back on track. 

Ephesians 1, tells me "long before the foundations of the earth", He had us in mind. He has settled onto us as the focus of His love, as it says in the Message Bible. 

I matter because I was made out of the focus of His love. I like that!  God thought of everything! 

In verse 11 it states, It's in Christ that we find out who we are and what we are living for. All our hopes and dreams designed in the beginning by Him. 

If I say I don't matter then I am saying what He has made, the dreams He has placed within me, doesn't matter. I want to see mine and His dreams come to fruition. 

I love the journey I am on, I get to see my dreams come true and I get to participate in making a differnce in the world around me. Each one of us matters, don't ever think you don't. Your world may be from one continent to another, or it may be the 50 feet around you. Either way you do matter and you can make a difference in that space. 

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Could It Be Any Clearer?

 Working in Mental health in California, or at least Shasta County is a bit challenging. It actually has made me sad because there are no resources in this county presently for those who are truly sick. In CA when someone has mental health issues they are often defined as a "5150". Just four numbers and you can be labled for the rest of your life. It can affect your job, your identity, and future decisions. It will be in the "system" wherever you go. 


What if your past, the times you have made an impulsive decision,  made some poor choices or just went through a difficult time in your life, and it was there to always remind you. 


In my past I had a period of time that was very difficult for me to get through. But I made it and I used it to help others. I look back on that time now and I am so glad for the grace of God and the love of my children. 


What if God labled you? Never forgot your mistakes? Never forgave you? That is what some of us walk in when we think we have to ask Christ to forgive us of our sins. Christ died for our sins, all of them!


I recently heard a teaching by Seth Dahl of how he would go through every night asking God to forgive every sin he committed that day. The realization, what if you forgot one? And because of that you would end of in hell instead of heaven?  Christ forgave all your sins, not just the ones you confessed. 


 Romans 6:6- 11 The Message Bible:
"Could it be any clearer? Our old way of life was nailed to the cross with Christ, a decisive end to that sin-miserable life—no longer at sin's every beck and call! What we believe is this: If we get included in Christ's sin-conquering death, we also get included in his life-saving resurrection. We know that when Jesus was raised from the dead it was a signal of the end of death-as-the-end. Never again will death have the last word. When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God. That's what Jesus did."


I love the Message Bible, how clearer could it be?  Patricia

Friday, October 28, 2011

Whatever you fear...

"Whatever you fear will ultimately become your master. This is the process of allowing deception to take control of your mind. It all starts by allowing small, cunning lies to creep in undetected. At first, they seem rational a vital contribution to the wellbeing of your personhood. They come cloaked in common sense and take up residence in side of logic and reason. But their deception is deep and destructive. Their words have nothing to do with the Father's heart, for they are only a facade of true light."

"Yet, because we are often oblivious to what is going on inside of us, it can be hard to recognize what is actually driving us."

An excerpt from, The Supernatural Power of Forgiveness by Jason Vallotton
Chapter "He Who Holds the Key", pg 56

This book is a great read, you can get it at Bethel's bookstore (ibethel.org) or Amazon.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Hugs and Lies and Laughter


What an amazing time in Revival Group today following Jason Vallotton's teaching on believing lies the enemy tells you and speaking about what you need from others. 
First Marlene has our group form an inner circle and an outer circle and we hugged each other, giving our best shot at the best hug we could give someone. Then rotate to the next person. Everyone began laughing and sharing with one another. I jumped the line and got double hugs from most everyone. At a total of 70 plus hugs. That’s a lot of love. lol

Next we went around the room telling the lies we have believed and then we just laughed at them. There was such breakthrough and freedom was released through out the room. Lies such as, I'm not beautiful, no would accept the real me, If I don’t do my best then I can't be blessed, I have to do to receive, no one will love me unconditionally, I'm not good enough, and on and on..So many lies and such breakthrough. 

Here are some comments posted from out RG FB page: 

" Really enjoyed laughing at lies today..... amazing how powerful that was. It was fun watching people's faces. We'd share a lie with somber face (and rightfully so, it's intimate), but some crazy guy burst out in obnoxiously loud laughter and everyone joins in.... you can't help but cement how silly/restrictive/destructive/etc. the lies actually were. Before I start preaching.... I love you guys. The End."

"Best revival group meeting so far, no? I'm not going to hide anymore and I'm not going to feed this false alter ego that's been trying to seduce me ever since I got here. I have something to give and I have something to receive!"

*Sigh* I'm so in love with God in the sense that He loves me so much that He placed me with all of you amazing people! Today was life changing to say the least. Having us go hug each other was something profoundly incredible for me and then to laugh at the lies.....Oh Jesus.....what fun! I love you all sooooo much and I can't wait to see what God will do next in our amazing family! :D YAY GOD!!!!!"

"Revival group was so wonderful today... so happy to be here with all you amazing peeps...Love you."

Thank you Lord for such breakthrough! 

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Prioritizing


So many thoughts, so many things I want to do. Sometimes I don't know which direction to take and then there are times I get frustrated with myself because I feel I should know better at this point in my life. The realization I need to take better care of myself as far as rest goes. I typically get 4 hours of sleep on average and I know its not good for you. I talked with one of my roommates tonight about prioritizing my life better and also I took Jake Veach's training last year on the "Seven Habits of highly Effective People". 
It tells you about prioritizing what’s important, what needs to be done now and what can wait. Its time to put this into place. Don't laugh, I already did. 

In my mind a lot of things are important but learning to categorize what I can do in this season and do well. The question is what will have to take a back seat? 

My first was to address my health. I want to lose weight but mostly I want to feel better and gain some strength. I deal with chronic pain and I am determined I am not going to let it control my life. Next on the list, what I wanted in relationship with community and personally. I have such amazing relationships and so it is hard when you have to say no I can't do that. I want time for photography and to paint, something I really enjoy. I am also working on an interactive journal I want to see completed this year. 

Well its time to go to bed, but I would love to hear some feedback. What areas are in your life you need to prioritize, do you already have a good system? Feel free to share what works for you. 

Friday, October 21, 2011

Nothing much to do about nothing...

Yes I know I didnt post last night. We had a costume party at Marlene's for our revival group and it was so much fun. We had some very creative people but I think the most creative were the 3 peas in a pod, I will have to post their picture so you can get the full effect. Of course my creativity wasnt stirred at all, I wore my nursing scrubs. Yeah I know, no challenge there. lol But I do have to say they expand with the all the food you eat lol. 


Because I haven't felt well today I am keeping it simple, I really don't want to think much either way. It's beautiful outside on this October day, and I am inside with a sweatshirt on lying in bed. It has given me a chance to catch up on my ibethel.tv and some reading. 


I hope you all are having a beautiful Friday and looking forward to the weekend. I begin my new job on Tuesday and once I get through the orientation phase I do believe I am going to enjoy it. I know I won't have to travel hours again to work unless I choose a shift here and there. I have learned to not burn bridges when it comes to jobs. Always keep your options open and flexible. :)


Bless you!!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

I'm exhausted...

For me, Monday and Wednesday's are the longest. I don't know if going straight to Shasta after a long day of BSSM makes the difference but I do know by the time 5:30p and BSSM gets out, I am already exhausted. Then home around 9ish from my night classes.

Our days are packed with meeting 1:1 with our small group of girls. My small group is 16 girls. I usually see 2 maybe 3, M-W. I love hearing their stories of what God is doing in their lives, how home life with many roommates are coming along, and what do they want to see God do for them this school year. 
There are laughs and tears, some happy, some sad but so good to see God in the midst of it all. When I came to first year I cried the first six weeks of school and then some. Not only was I homesick, but also God was pouring out just how much He loved me. That was hard for me to grasp. I always learned to show God how much we love Him, but it just wasn't what He had scheduled for me. That revelation of how much He loves me/you, how forgiving, showing His grace is immeasurable. I just love that Man lol. 

Today we had small group leaders training. Technically that is a small group in a small group in a revival group in a large school of ministry. Okay I had to have a little fun with that. lol

Then Jason taught on pain in our intern meeting this afternoon. Enough said on that unless you want me to cry. 

What I learned today is just how tender one's heart can be and how our Daddy picks us up and holds us in His big arms. Knowing we can rest there and be at peace. I can never get enough of that. 


Tuesday, October 18, 2011

What is your lens telling you?


There is time and then there is “Bethel” time. I heard this when I first came to school and it didn’t take me long to realize what that meant. Very little starts on time at Bethel and I use to get frustrated about it. Being on time meant being reliable, accountable and honoring to the person or event you are scheduled to be at. God has taught me a lot about this and although being punctual is a good thing, it also can be an issue too.
There are times you have to let go of the smaller stuff and see the whole picture. I have been so blessed by Bethel. I have learned to serve and learned to lead in a whole new way. God has honored my faithfulness to those things I have put my hand and my heart to. As the saying goes, don’t sweat the small stuff; it’s just not worth it.
In our intern meeting today Jason was teaching about “rebuilding the lens” and although this could mean many things, today I applied it to seeing what I was receiving from school and not why isn’t this that way or this way. Etc…
What is your lens telling you?

Monday, October 17, 2011

To purposefully set the presence of the day.


                     To Purposefully Set the Presence of the Day

I am learning to take each morning as I wake up and set the day to purposefully be in His presence. You see there is a difference setting the presence of the day. Today was important to set the presence before the day even began.

Meeting some of the revival group girls one on one, then school began. There is always homework to read and enter into the computers, books to be given out and many hugs to fill up anyone’s love tank. All the interns are together today in the Great room. We only get two days where we are all together and have a place of belonging so to speak.

As I sat at the table I felt a sensation come over me. Not one I was comfortable with and I knew where it was coming from. Last year October 17, 2010, I lost two family members to murder/suicide. I recalled last year being one of the hardest days of my life because the last words I had with my stepsister were out of anger. I couldn’t take it back, but I was able to give it to God.  I didn’t know how to get through school because guilt was eating me up.

Today was victory because I purposefully set myself to not live in guilt and regret. To know how God sees me, and where I stand with Him. So when a friend wrapped her arms around me and asked me to ask the Holy Spirit where my stepsister was and how was she doing, I knew all was well, because He said so.

Are there still tears? Of course. But she would tell me to get over it, what’s done is done. She always knew how to live in the moment.

Thank you Father for always knowing what I need.  Today was a good day!

First Year BSSM Internship...10/16/11


October 16th, 2011

First Year Bethel School of the Supernatural Ministry Internship

Wow that is a mouthful! This is how it feels also on a daily basis. The first month I was so excited but it didn’t take long for me to feel overwhelmed. I am learning a lot through this experience so I decided since I feel the nudging of Christ to blog more, okay maybe not nudging, actually right out telling me He wants me to write more, then I shall do so.

I am very critical of my writing but this is a time of being vulnerable and honest about how I feel, my fears, my successes, my failures, what I am learning and how I am growing as an intern for Revival Group Pastor Marlene Aaronson.

I have said before I was going to write on a regular basis so as the saying goes, “try, try, try again” goes, here we go again.  I hope you follow and I would love your feedback. Maybe I will have more than 2 followers by the time this is done. My goal is to write daily till the end of school, May 2012.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Sears, Me and God


Waiting at Sears to get my oil changed. A lady is obviously upset and crying on the phone. It was hard to not hear what she was saying. She hung up and out of know where I asked her could I share something with her? Now you have to know that I just re-learned this week about trying to fix things that don't belong to me, so I couldnt believe I opened my mouth so quickly. 
She agreed and I talked with her briefly about taking on things that aren't her responsiblity and trying to fix someone who's not willing to work on it themselves. Do you see where I am going with this? Well she was really thankful but I wasn't expecting the next queston. Tell me, where did you go to find this out? My spiritual answer? TheTransformation Center. Yep thats what I told her. So I gave her the number and invited her to the "I am Woman" class at Bethel on Tuesday nights. She took the information and I gave her a hug while she cried. She knew God had jsut met a need.  God is so good and if you know me, you know this is a testimony b/c I didnt try to fix her I just gave her the info and some loving.  

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Don't Pass up the Opportunities


Have you ever put off or passed on the opportunity to speak of God into someone's life? Most of us have out of fear of what are they going to think, what if I am making the wrong assumption, etc..
Because I was in a hospital today that doesn’t allow you to "impose" your beliefs on your patients, God had another idea. I only had one patient and it was definitely God appointed. This patient was at the end stages of colon cancer and she just recently found out so she is going through a grieving process, her and her family. 

All day she was one on one, staying on top of pain medications and being at her side while she was sick. By the end of my shift she was pretty much sedated but my heart was unsettled because from all appearances she was not saved. How could I leave her without giving her a chance to accept Christ? I had prayed over her all day for healing, for peace and for salvation. I talked earlier with her grandmother about healing and told her I had seen healing and I believed it could happen for her granddaughter. She agreed, for she had witnessed a miracle in her own life before.

I made one last stop before leaving for the night. She was not alert but I had to say something, so I told her she didn’t have to fear death because there was life after life. I shared with her briefly about having a relationship with Christ and all she had to do was to ask Him to come into her life. As I waited by her side for another minute, she suddenly squeezed my hand. I knew she had heard me. 

Thank you Lord for allowing me to be your vessel, to show Your love, mercy and grace. 

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

New Mexico Minsitry trip 2011


Albuquerque New Mexico Feb/March 2011


This ministry trip was definitely full of laughter and joy. Matter of fact I don’t think I have ever laughed this hard or this long at one time. This trip was about Culture of Honor with Danny and Sheri Silk (lovingonpurpose.com)

We taught middle school aged kids how to prophesy. After practicing on one another they went into the congregation and prophesied over individuals they felt God was highlighting to them. The adults loved it and in the process family wounds were also mended.

Many were prophesied over and prayed for. Physical and emotional pain was healed. God loves each one of us unconditionally. May you experience the fullness of God’s grace and His love for you.

Our host homes treated us with authentic “New Mexico” style food and we spent our free time connecting and prophesying over one another.  We laughed so hard, on more than one occasion, while ministering to one another.  Each time someone would get close to us, or out “circle” of ministry they too would be affected and begin to laugh uncontrollably.

We learned what honor looks like at any age and in any relationship. Something I learned in this conference is, sometimes we lose sight of what honor looks like because of familiarity, especially with family. Having boundaries with someone doesn’t mean you don’t honor them or respect them.  

To end this I faced one of my fears, heights. I never had an issue with heights until I did a rescue years ago from a high-rise construction sight. We had to bring the guy down in a Fireman’s basket. The Fireman told me right off, “don’t look down” and it was the first thing I did automatically. I became light-headed and since then have had a fear of really high heights.  So I got on the longest tram in the world, Sandia Peak.  Looking over the edge of the mountain was beautiful.